Everyone could use a good laugh in the middle of the week. Wednesday, often called “hump day,” can sometimes feel like a mountain to climb. A funny quote can brighten your mood and help you push through. We’ve gathered some of the best funny quotes to make your Wednesday a bit more enjoyable.
These quotes offer a short break from work stress and daily challenges. They bring smiles, lighten hearts, and remind us that humor is a great way to cope. So, take a moment, relax, and read on for a good laugh.
Most Hilarious Wednesday Quotes
“It’s only Wednesday and I’m already 95% done with this week.”
“Keep calm. Pretend it’s not Wednesday.”
“It’s Wednesday! I’m breathing. I’m healthy. I’m truly blessed. I’m grateful for this day.”
“Nothing screws up your Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.”
“Wednesdays are like Mondays in the middle of the week!”
“The only way I can get through Wednesday is by avoiding people who call it ‘Hump Day’.”
“There’s something wonderfully bold and liberating about saying yes to our entire imperfect and messy life.”
“Wednesday: The day when even the coffee needs a coffee.”
“When you wake up on Wednesday, you know you have survived half of the week.”
“Wednesdays are like Mondays in the middle of the week!”
“Some people call it Wednesday, I like to call it the day I can see the weekend from my couch.”
“Wednesday is a day to help others celebrate life. You and only you are accountable for what you extend and give to others.”
“On Wednesdays, we wear pink.”
“The sun himself is weak when he first rises, and gathers strength and courage as the day gets on.”
“They didn’t want it good, they wanted it Wednesday.”
“Elephants love Wednesday, and so will you.”
“If Wednesday had a face, I would punch it.”
“What do I like about Wednesdays? Everything.”
“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”
“Wednesdays are for reminding yourself that you are halfway to the weekend, and it’s okay to laugh at how stressful the week has been so far.”
“Wednesday is like the middle finger of the week.”
Unexpectedly Amusing Quotes for Wednesday
“I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.”
“I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.”
“I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.”
“Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.”
“My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.”
“I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.”
“If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.”
“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”
“Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.”
“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”
“I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.”
“Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver.”
“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”
“To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.”
“If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?”
“I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.”
“The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so.”
“The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.”
“Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.”
“If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea… does that mean that one enjoys it?”
Quirky Quotes to Beat Wednesday Blues
“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
“You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.”
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”
“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”
“The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.”
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”
“Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.”
“If life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.”
“To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.”
“He who laughs last didn’t get the joke.”
“I dream of a better tomorrow where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.”
“Age is merely the number of years the world has been enjoying you. Cheers!”
“Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.”
“A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory.”
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”
“Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair.”
“Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.”
Collection of Best Wednesday Humor Quotes
“Wednesdays are like Mondays in the middle of the week!”
“Middle age is when you’re sitting at home on a Wednesday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn’t for you.”
“Help! Why is Wednesday spelled like that?”
“When people refer to ‘Back in the Day,’ it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.”
“It’s only Wednesday… hang in there!”
“Keep calm! It’s only Wednesday; we still have more days to survive!”
“If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.”
“Why is it that the office can feel like a trial on Monday, but by Wednesday, it feels more like a sitcom?”
“Just remember, every Wednesday is ONE day closer to Friday.”
“Wednesday is a day to help others celebrate life. You and only you are accountable for what you extend and give to others. One smile not only increases your value but it gives joy to each person you meet.”
“The sun always shines on Wednesdays if you just look at it right.”
“Wednesday is a day to remind yourself that you are halfway to the weekend. Hang in there, you’ll make it!”
“I’ve heard of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, but somehow Saturday and Sunday always get away from me.”
“Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right… it’s only Wednesday.”
“Wednesdays are like a glass half full – in the middle but just enough hope to keep you going.”
“Wednesday’s child is full of woe… and so are most grown-ups.”
Optimistic and Fun Wednesday Quotes
“They didn’t want it good, they wanted it Wednesday.”
“Keep calm; it’s only Wednesday. We still have two more days to survive.”
“Happy Wednesday! Remember, you are halfway to the weekend. Keep it up!”
“Wednesday: Halfway to the weekend! Enjoy your day!”
“Keep your spirits high; it’s hump day!”
“Wednesday is a day to help others celebrate life. You and only you are accountable for what you extend and give to other people. One smile not only increases your value but it gives joy to each person you meet.”
“To some, it’s Hump Day. To us, it’s Wednesday’s getting its groove on!”
“Let’s be the sunshine on this cloudy Wednesday.”
“Good things come to those who slog through Wednesday!”
“Wednesday: It’s almost, sorta, kinda, close to, just about, nearly the weekend…”
“The best thing about Wednesday? It’s not Monday!”
“Wednesday means we’re halfway to the weekend and we should be having more fun. Let’s make this the best hump day ever!”
“Smile, it’s Wednesday! Halfway to the weekend, halfway to no more work.”
“If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.”
“It’s Wednesday, so here’s my wise advice for the day: Smile, even if you don’t want to. Fake it till you make it, my dear.”
“When a day that you happen to know is Wednesday starts off sounding like Sunday, there is something seriously wrong somewhere.”
“The week is half over. Your glass should be twice as full by now!”
“My job is to give people little pieces of my heart. On Wednesday, I get days off for good behavior.”
Witty Wednesday Quotes to Lighten Your Day
“I can resist everything except temptation.”
“My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.”
“I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book.”
“A day without laughter is a day wasted.”
“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”
“I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.”
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.”
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
“Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.”
“Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.”
“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
“If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.”
“If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.”
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
“Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.”
“I’m an idealist. I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m on my way.”
“Age is something that doesn’t matter unless you are a cheese.”
“Always remember that you are unique – just like everyone else.”
“If the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.”
Wrapping-up
And there you have it—some of the best funny quotes to brighten your Wednesday. These quotes can help lighten the mood, make you laugh, and offer a quick escape from the mid-week blues. Whether you share them with friends, family, or keep them to yourself for a little boost, they serve as a reminder that humor is a great way to get through the week.
Keep this list handy for any Wednesday that needs a little bit of laughter. Bookmark this page, and return whenever you need a smile. After all, a good laugh is always worth it, especially on a Wednesday.
